We are arguing over $20.00. The thought strikes me and I can't help but think that this is hilarious; both in the capacity that I don't have an extra $20.00 somewhere, but also that they are getting this crazy over verifying my payment. Jess was sympathetic to my attempt to move through the world with only as much money as I absolutely needed. She said, "Let's just pay for your bed with my card, you give me the money. Then I have $20, you have your hostel, and we both avoid bank fees."
It sounded good when she said it. But now that I'm here and I don't have her credit card with me, things are getting less fun. Let's just say that this hostel check-in almost broke my resolve. I tried to explain what I was attempting, but to people who have been raised in the jail cell mindset of capitalism, someone who dosen't have $20 isn't someone who should be listened to. I was one moment (a moment where the hostel could have conceivably just refused to give me a bed and I would have ended up sleeping under a bridge in our nation's capital) away from just cashing all of this in and crawling back home, getting a job at a gas station, and just waiting for death.
But then, like it always does, it worked out.
After just enough hassle for me to understand the lesson, the money went through, everyone was all smiles, and the world was right again. I understand now that if I am going to live like this, I shouldn't try and involve other people. The security that the perceived power of money brings people is not to be tampered with in America... yet. If I want to live on $20 a day, I should just have that $20 in my pocket and pretend like there are more $20 to be had if necessary, so other people don't get riled up. That way people don't look at me cross. That way, I don't become a burden.
I also was also reaffirmed in my resolve to shed my attachment to all of these methods of control that American society has instituted on itself. Money only exists as a symbol of power. It separates those who have power, those who are attempting to prove that they have some kind of worth, from those who are less powerful, those who have not concocted some scheme to grab a piece of the pie and hoard it for themselves in order to go to sleep another night in the soft illusion that everything is okay because they have security.
I'm done with that whole idea. I can't imagine a time where I will ever hold on to money that I don't need. All money is EXTRA money, as far as I'm concerned. I will only keep enough of it to allow me to be as effective as I can in reaching my goals and being of help to others. Right now I only need enough to move through the world and observe. I am writing, documenting my travels so that other people can follow my lead if they like, enjoy my foolishness if they like, scoff and mumble to themselves what a god damn idiot I am if they like. This life is not very expensive. Perhaps someday I will be in a position where I can use more money to achieve greater ends, but I'll deal with that when I get to it.
For now, all of that was behind us. I thanked Jess and the hostel people profusely and headed out into the city.
I may have been a bit harsh when initially describing our nation's capital in my other blog. There really is beauty, art, and culture here. The monuments to the men who built this society (forgetting their lesser qualities and remembering their great works) are awe inspiring. The museums go on for days and they are mostly free. You can see the only Da Vinci in North America and an original Pollock here. You can learn about science and nature and art. You can watch beautiful women and foreign visitors from all over the world and the melting pot of American citizens of every creed, color, background, or sexual orientation walk around without fear of attack or wrongful persecution. I want this to last, but I know that there are currently people sitting in dark rooms, scheming to make all of these people's lives as difficult as possible. And all over a few dollars. And actually, the rooms aren't even that dark. They are right out in the open.
Anyway, I put all of that out of my mind and I enjoy myself. I walk all the way from the capital building (which is closed off) to the other end where there is the mall and the Lincoln Memorial. I have everything at a glance, hit the highlights. I'll buzz back through and spend a little more time in a few of the museums tomorrow. I will say this, though. If you're here, don't puss out on the Jefferson Memorial. I know that it's kind of far away and Lincoln is super tempting, but show a little god damn respect. Jefferson wrote the fucking Declaration of Independence! He was a pretty decent dude. And the memorial, surrounded by water and other great statues (including FDR and Martin Luther King Jr.) is totally worth it. If you do it right, you'll see all of that and then end up at Lincoln in the evening when he's less crowded and more majestic, overlooking the mall in the dusklight. Then you can stroll back up and take a picture of Obama's crib (the White House, where Obama will live for 15 more days, until they give it to a total piece of crap and his family of assholes).
It's funny seeing the humble clutter where all of this began in Philadelphia on one day and then seeing all the grandeur that it has become the next.
I kind of think that it is too much. Has America reached her peak? It kind of seems so. We are living in interesting times, where a new revolution for freedom, a broader and more inclusive freedom that our founding fathers didn't foresee, may be on the horizon. There may be struggle to get there, but as I stand here looking at what can be achieved when people fight for what they think is right, I realize that it will be worth it. Perhaps it is time to take the next step. America is amazing for what it has achieved, but where do we go from here?
If we can make the world a better place, we should. Many times this means making changes to a system that is broken, and that is never easy. First, we have to get outside of that system and look at it from a neutral perspective. If we try to fix it from the inside, we are relying on it too much to be effective. We are a part of it, therefore we fundamentally don't want it to change. We will compromise when our own comfort is put on the line. We have to get away from the idea of comfort if we are to move towards greater freedom and equality. There are just too many institutions and controls built into this system to ever get out from under them. The system needs to be rebuilt or, preferably, dismantled entirely. The time for control of the flow of power is over. Power should be equally distributed to all. No one should have want, or fear.
There are only two ways this will happen. One would be for the people who have a majority of the power to simply relinquish it to the world around them. Not likely to happen in Trump's America. The other way to even out the distribution of power is for those who have need, those who are oppressed or taken advantage of, those who live in fear, to shed that fear and rise up. If we want equality, true equality the kind of which our founding fathers were dreaming of, we have to do something to get it. We have to take it. We have to take it not because it is owed to us, but because it is ours to begin with.
When I get back to the hostel, some money from freelance writing has come in. Not much, but enough to get down the road, to the next place.
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